Posted in Replying to Atheists

Reply to Skeptical Atheist’s Video on: Prophet Muhammad’s Marriage to Aisha.

This is a reply to this video: See the video and read my reply. The reply is in active style because it was posted as an answer on his YouTube channel.

Before I begin, let me clarify my position. I have read all the arguments regarding age of Aisha, and I can have seen merits and shortcomings in all of them, and it has left me very confused to decide what the truth is. I find arguments of those who say that her age was 19 years old more convincing because her young age doesn’t fit with the rest of Prophet’s life, like her presence during Battle of Badr/Uhud at 11 years of age is impossible as boys of 15 years of age were not allowed to go to battlefield. At the same time those who say she was much younger have strong arguments as well, like the hadith of Aisha playing with toys with horses with wings. The arguments on both sides are convincing, however I tilt towards her 19 years of age argument because it fits with overall Prophet’s life perfectly but I cannot discount the arguments of much younger age. Next, age of Aisha is not a theological question for Muslims like me, so it does not matter to my faith what I believe her age of marriage was. Since it is not a matter of faith a lot of weak Hadith can be used and are used, this has led to difficulties in deciding what to believe and what not to believe. To conclude, I believe that age of Aisha could have been anything from 9 to 19, but I tend towards her much older age. Lastly she was married only after reaching puberty, and puberty is when I know I should stop considering someone as child.

Coming to your video, What is exactly your problem? Because, you have discussed the age gap between Prophet and Aisha as well. But it is not uncommon to hear 20 year old girls marrying 67 year old men. Hence I don’t think you should mix this issue as this is not be a problem in most of societies, there are thousands of people with that age gap. Tomorrow if my mother dies, how should I feel about my father (a septuagenarian) marrying a 20 years old? Can’t say about you, but I will feel jealous that his wife is younger than mine, nothing else. And why should I have a problem , the 20 year old married him out of her own free will, why should anyone have any objections? So let it be reinstated that you do not have problem with the age gap between them as you wouldn’t have if my father married a 20 year old. Next comes the question of age itself.

Before I begin my argument, I want to reinstate position and intelligence of Aisha, she is considered the wisest of women of her time, she was an intellectual, a scholar, a teacher, a jurist, many caliphs sought her advice on many things, she was far more accomplished in her society than I or you can ever be. Caliphs who were technically more powerful than any other King or Emperor sought her advice on extremely serious matters, let us be frank, I and you will never reach a position like that, because there is no one man who has so much control over so much humanity or territory. And you can’t say that she had that position because she was wife of Prophet, because there were other wives as well, so her position as an intellectual and a scholar was gained by her own study and intellect. If she is filled with all these qualities, it would be important to ask what did she think of her being married at 6 and her marriage being consummated at 9 feel? Or is it that you think that she has no say in the matter that primarily concerns her? You have thrown Aisha out of the question that is about her? Why have you never discussed how did Aisha feel, while she was herself so accomplished. If she can take an Army to gates of Caliph with her demands, it would stupefying not to include her opinion on the matter.

Now we come to the next question, a very important one that you just brushed aside. Who is a child? Your main point in this affair has been that this marriage is morally wrong because Prophet Muhammad married a child, but you are not willing to acknowledge who is a child. I firmly believe that a childhood is over when one reaches puberty. Aisha was married when she had reached puberty, hence I refuse to acknowledge her as a child. So your question is irrelevant to me, because I know Prophet did not consummated his marriage with a child but it was consummated with an adult. Even today, age of sexual consensus remains debated and every country has their own opinion. New York State says it is okay for an 11 year old to have sex, but that is limited by the age of partner, but essentially they do not see a problem with an 11 year old having sex, but that is not your argument, your argument is that no one should have any sex with a 11 year old. But New York State says it is okay for a 14 year old boy to have sex with an 11 year old girl, then leave her pregnant and abandoned. Why do you have no problem with it, and I am saying so because you made a video about Aisha and not about 11 year old girls in New York State whose boyfriends have abandoned them. If it is physically and medically wrong for an 11 year old to have sex, then it should be same for men of all ages, or your argument is based on penis size of 14 year old boy and an 18 year old adult man? Fact is that the matter of age of consent is very complicated. Italy allows 13 year old girls to have sex with upto 18 year old boys, how are such physical, mental and other such problems associated in this case. In Germany, 14 years old are allowed to have sex with upto age of 21. Japan has 13 with adults, Lesotho as 14 with adults. So my friend, you can not shy away from defining who a child is and what should be the age of consent, and you must give reasons why you think that age is the correct age.

As stated previously I believe that age of childhood ends at puberty. When that age is crossed whether male or female their body is ready to have sexual relationship. That is a natural age when a person leaves childhood. There are millions of articles written about how young adolescents (10-13 years old) have their bodies ready to have sex, their bodies have gone through all the changes biologically required to have sex. Next comes the social and mental well being, my kids and all their friends in UK and indeed when you were 10 year old, you were half as smart as the 10 year old kid in India who works in a Dhaba (local lower class restaurant) serving tea, clearing tables, etc. He is often abandoned child, lives on street, knows how the money works, is smarter and has been looking after himself since the time he can remember. There is no competition that children in UK will be at least 15-16 years old when they can survive alone in the world. These children in India become adults quickly, they mature quickly, they know how the world around them works, something which is alien to the kids going to school here. My argument is training. Life trains street kids in things from early on they can handle much more than we can think of, kids are very resilient, Slumdog Millionaire would serve as a good refresher of how smart street kids could be. Similarly, when they are growing in an environment when they know that they would be married when they reach puberty they are not psychologically scarred as some might want to argue, they take it as another stage of life, like children in UK take qualifying from Primary to Secondary School. Thus Aisha never showed any signs of scarring because of her marriage or consummation of her marriage, and she should remain the focus of argument, after all the argument is about her marriage.

To conclude, you need to define who a child is, and why do you think that your selected age is correct age and how does this marriage scar a child when one is trained for it, if one does get scarred why did Aisha not show any sign on it throughout her life. If marrying a child and consummating marriage with her is so detrimental for the child, why does Aisha show no effect of it? Fact is that you do not care about Aisha, your enemy is Prophet Muhammad and your objective is demonising him. If that was not the case, your video should have been how Prophet Muhammad destroyed the life of Aisha by consummating their marriage when she was 9 years old AS TOLD BY AISHA. Why is Aisha so absent from your argument, when the argument is about her?

Fact is marriage of Aisha and Prophet Muhammad was no exploitation of any kind, Aisha was not a child at the time of her marriage. She did not suffer any physiological or psychological damage of any kind or are you among those men who want to control opinions and choices women make, like the choice Aisha made of marrying Prophet Muhammad? Let alone Aisha, ask believing religious Muslim women of today if they would want to swap places with Aisha, and you would know the result. I know because I asked several of my cousins, doctors, engineers, lawyers and teachers overwhelming majority said that they would swap places with Aisha.


Humanist, Muslim, Doabi, Hyderabadi, Londoner, European. Urdu Lover